Home » Humor » Who is Illie Fustaigne and why do they call me Illie?

Who is Illie Fustaigne and why do they call me Illie?

As someone who has had a conversation nearly with every single woman in Western Plains, and nearly some of the married ones as well, it came as a complete surprise to me when I was asked to write this article not about tennis.
I knew from a very young age that I had a rare linguistic disability. I was born exceptionally long winded and while in some social situations this is a blessing, I also discovered that on account of their extraordinary length, as well as their subject matter, my sentences would prevent me from having conversations with as many women as I could have, had I been more interesting perhaps or maybe just a tad more concise at times.
You know, a lot of people often mistakenly compare me with tennis legend Illie Nastase who insisted that everyone call him “Mr Nastase” but I never did that. I was happy for people to call me just plain Illiterate and I [read more long sentences….]

 

Ilie+Nastase

Average number of times I mention myself in a conversation? Forty, love.

 

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