Fustaigne Publishing is pleased to announce that, according to sources, it has won the contract let by the South Korean Spy Agency to revise several popular children’s tales. Are you sitting comfortably? Well, let’s begin.
For many years, according to sources, people in North Korea lived under the rule of a foolish communist dictator. He was secretive and reclusive. Everywhere you went there were pictures of him – in shops, offices, factories and prisons, which is a sign of just how secretive and reclusive he was.
The people of North Korea were not very happy as, according to sources, they thought that at any minute they might be tied up with string, sold in the market and included as the main ingredient in a casserole or stir-fry, according to sauces.
One day the dictator decided to go on a walking trip around the country to visit his missile launch sites, prison camps and such like. He had to travel barefoot because otherwise this fairytale would have no punch-line.
After several weeks, he would almost certainly have returned to his underground bunker if he had one.
However, he had one problem. The roads were very rough, and as a result the dictator had intolerable pain in his feet.
So he issued a central directive commanding the Government to cover all the roads in the country with comfortable leather. Immediately his Ministers carried out his order and all the cows in the country were killed in order to get enough leather.
What an idiot! If only North Korea had a capitalist economy then market forces would have covered the roads with comfortable leather without the need for Government intervention!