I remember when John first came to me for advice on how to ‘make the scene’. John, I said, John, forget the punk poetry! Nobody wants to listen to a lot of whinging marxist shite – you can’t dance to it at parties. Second, if you want to be taken seriously as a performing artist, lose that feckin ridiculous bunnet and get yourself a trendy polka-dot handkerchief. Well, the rest, as they say, is a mystery.